FREEDOM!!!

The picture of Mel Gibson strapped to a torture table screaming out his last words comes to mind: "FREEEEEEEE-DOOOOOOOOMMMM!!!!"

But to tell you the truth, I think that's what it's all about.  That's the answer. 
Living with emotional and verbal abuse can often feel like a prison, but it's one you don't even realize that you're in until you've been there for years. 

You of course wouldn't marry someone so they could abuse you.  "I promise to degrade, abuse and belittle you, till death do us part."  You marry them because you love them, and you believe that they love you.  But then, one by one, the micro little comments start, so stealthy and back-handed, you don't even realize it.  But, you start to believe them.   While you know that you are a strong, beautiful, independent woman, you also start to believe that you are fat, ugly, weak and stupid.  Been there.   Even after he leaves and you realize how much he's been mistreating you, it can often times still take years to recover from that abuse.   It can take a long time to unlearn the lies.

But, Freedom!   I found freedom when I realized that the abuse and the negativity were all rooted in lies.  I wasn't fat.  I was beautiful.   I wasn't stupid.  I was brilliant.   I wasn't weak.  I was STRONG!   It helped me to realize that his wheelhouse was his ability to lie, with those big, brown, puppy dog eyes, and that soft, tender voice that sounded oh so sincere.    Like a cyanide pill in a yummy chocolate candy shell.   When I finally realized that his persuasion was only in his ability to tell a convincing lie, the lies lost all their power.   I was able to take whatever he said and flip it around and find the truth, basically, in the opposite of whatever he said.   Recognize the source.  It made it so much easier to deal with.   Like in John 8:44, when Jesus says that Satan is the "father of all lies, and when he lies, he speaks his native language."   I finally was able to just realize that all the nasty, mean things that he said about me were just lies.   Now, it's automatic, whenever he says anything, I just assume that the opposite of that is true, or that what he's trying to say about me is really something true about himself, which is called projecting.

I pray for freedom for you, Dear One.   Freedom from the lies.    I pray that you would know the truth, and that the truth will set you free.   Don't believe your abuser's lies.    You are beautiful, strong, precious, loved, intelligent, lovable, and worthy of genuine love and affection, and you deserve to be treated with diginity, respect and kindness, and to live in freedom and joy.

Hugs!!!
MWP